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im 21. studying in SP ( Business Admin ). i love malay novels. i love malay dramas. i love korean dramas. JIWANG rocks my socks. i love singing. im a huge fan of KAMAL ADLI & ASHRAF MUSLIM!!!
 admission to SP (Business School) to see my mum walk again =d to own a personal laptop a BIG birthday party in 2011 a simple MAKEOVER a BOYFRIEND by the age of 23???
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Friday, June 25, 2010 @ 8:59 PM hey peepz.. time checked:8.22pm im in my room alone.. im feeling kinda down.. suppose 2 mit my gerfrenz 2moro.. bt i gt 2 cancel my planz coz noone 2 take care of my mum.. my dad gt sum badminton tournament 2moro.. my bro sure goin out wit hiz fiance.. & im left alone wit my mum AGAIN.. im nt complaining bt jz upset.. laz wk planz was cancelled 2 & tiz wk again cancelled.. i jz feel tat i dun get e freedom i use 2 hav.. y does im alwayz e one who haz 2 sacrifice my teenage freedom & life?.. cant sumbody else do it instead?.. itz hard 2 jz stay at home 24 hourz a day, 7 dayz a week.. im tired of tiz kind of life.. i feel tat im useless.. suddenly i feel lyke giving up my life.. yes ppl.. i feel veri2 tired & cant take tiz anymore.. i wanna scream out loud.. y is it me?!!.. as im writing tiz.. tears r dropping.. yez ppl im crying.. itz jz hard 4 me 2 hold back my tearz.. i jz feel my heart is torn into pieces.. i cant even take tyme off 2 release boredness staying at home e whole wk..n it suckz!.. mondae skewlz goin 2 start & life will b back 2 normal..  4rom skewl 2 home..wat a boring life!.. i noe my life will alwayz stay tiz way & itz nvr goin 2 change.. yez ppl.. i dunno y i feel tiz way.. i seldom hangout lyke other growing teenagerz.. my tyme r alwayz spent staying at home doing houzewerk tat nvr endz.. n again it tires me out.. maeb i should jz sleep & nvr wake up again.. then ppl wil realize how hard it is witout me doing e werk & taking care of e household.. nobody understandz how i feel.. im keeping al tiz bcoz i dun wanna hurt e feelingz of ppl i luv.. they hav their own problemz & i dun wanna burden them.. bt sumtymez keeping al e pain wil jz hurt me even more.. for godz sake!.. i need tyme off!.. y do they get 2 spend al their tyme outside bt i cant even step out 4 a moment?.. i dunno wat i should do.. ive been keeping tiz 4 so long.. & feel tat i hav 2 pour it out.. maeb tiz blog understandz me more.. i cant even get a companion coz im 2 bz wit my boring life.. even if i find one im afraid he will get bored & leave me coz i dun hav tyme 2 spare even 4 a moment.. dear god.. plze alwayz giv me e strength i need 2 endure al tiz pain & hardshipz.. let me find sumone who can understand & share al tiz pain.. & 2 my gerlfrenz.. im sori coz i gt 2 break off our appointment 2 meet up.. it was so unexpected.. i didnt mean it.. maeb we mit next tyme if i hav e tyme.. i miz u guyz alot.. we nvr mit 4 quite sum tyme bt gt 2 cancel our appointment.. sori again guyz.. luv ya.. |